happy happy joy joy

So today Erin and I were talking (over Yahoo messenger) about how we accociate songs with times in our life. I do all the time and I was thinking how lucky I am, because all the memories that come up for me are good ones, times when I was really happy. Not that I'm not happy now of course, but it's nice to have so many good memories. Like the Norah Jones CD will always make me remember when I lived in a studio on Newbury Street, it was the first time I had ever lived alone and I felt so hip and cool, city girl. I would walk home from work the the Boston Common and the Public Gardens and I just felt so grown-up. I could drink wine in my apt and people watch from the windows.

And my Kathleen Edwards CD will always remind me of the summer I lived in Arlington in this house with 2 other girls, and it was at the top a HUGE hill. But I was working for the Eye Bank and I was making more $$$ then I had ever made in my life. We had a company car and I would drive down Mass Ave. from my house and stop at Carberry's and get an iced coffee and a cinnamon scone (they are TO DIE FOR) and I had A/C in the car (it was so hot that summer), it was an Izuzu Rodeo. I would drive down Memorial Drive to work and I remember I was really, really happy as I looked over Boston and munched on my scone in traffic.

I am really happy now too, I am in love and I make even more $$$ now! And I have traveled a lot more, and I am sure there will be a song on now that I will hear 20 years from now and remember how happy I am now.

Grim Reaper

So there was a week when I was working on the ambulance and I acted as the grim reaper, I got 3 codes (cardiac arrests=dead) in a span of like 4 days, that is a lot for northern Vermont. It passed but for that week I seemed to bring death everywhere I went.

There was also the time when I sent letters or cards to people and they died; my grandpa (that morning), my old next door neighbor (the next day) and my great-grandmother (within 2 days). I am not bringing death recently but it has been on my mind because of the death of 2 celebs and then a friend of a friend. All were too young (25,28,20) and all probably weren't meant to die.

I should be used to this seeing how I worked in a morgue for about 4 years, but it just sucks for the living left behind. It can happen in an instant and your life can change in the span of a 30 second phone call. Mike jokes about it, like "what would you do if I died tomorrow" and I can't stand it! Because it happens all the time, hit by a bus, scaffolding falling on you as you wait in traffic, part of a tunnel crashing on you as you are a passenger in a car. I am just happy if I get to bed every night and I wake up every morning. Especially if I have good hair. (just to lighten the mood)

Dude Ryan is funny!

So I was just on my friend Ryan's facebook page and I never actually read what he had listed as his job, dude the kid is hilarious! Well he isn't a kid, he's 27 but that's younger then me so, kid. (PS as an aside that Kid is the name of David Duchovney's son but they spell it Kyd, that's just dumb) So anyway, here is a smattering of what Ryan wrote under his profession as a freelancer:

escort for your ugly cousin - $100($250 if she's really ugly, $500 if she is a he), friend for hire (rates vary by popularity), prom date (virgins only) - $69, impersonating a Harvard recruiter - $75, actor (no reality) - $20,000,000, dog walker - $30 per poopage, porn star - $200 per money shot, bad milk taster - $50 for everyday past expiration, Republican - $40,000, Antichrist - $666

Dude the boy is FUNNY! There is a link to his blog to your right, go read it!

I caved

So I have been super good about eating well and exercising and I caved today. I haven't had a cookie since Christmas! And I have been laying off the candy at work everyday. I had like 1 Hershey kiss last week and a piece of chocolate from Belgium, but come on someone brought it for me from Europe what am I going to do? Say no? Whatevs.

And now I have just finished 6 pieces of candy, 6! I think it was because a) I heart chocolate and b) I am in constant pain from my invisaligns. I know that I brought this on myself and blah blah blah, but cheeks are cut to shreads in one place and that is what hurts a LOT!

And the fact that since Jan. 1st I have only lost 7lbs, and then gained back 1lb. WTF! I only lost that much after denying myself chocolate, french fries, pasta, pizza and bread type products in general. Poo.

Oh why wasn't I born with a freakish metabolism like Giselle so that I too could scarf down pizza and beer and look like a supermodel. (sigh)

Dumb marrieds

So I am not married but I don't get why some married people I know act the way that they do; I just don't get it. When you exchange vows and register at Crate & Barrel do you go insane or something? Or do you take a class, separate from each other about different rules that each of you can follow. Like if you get married, why would you cheat on your spouse? I think cheating is just a symptom of something else wrong, but why don't you TALK ABOUT IT! If you can't talk to your spouse then you shouldn't have gotten married. Maybe BEFORE you sleep with another person who isn't your spouse, you may want to mention that you aren't happy or something.

Also why would you tell you husband he can't spend money unless he clears it with you first, even $20. Unless he has a crack habit or a gambling addiction I don't know why you need to police people that you are "spending the rest of you life with".

And if you don't like your husband or wife, like you don't want to hang around with them, then why did you get married?

Humans are weird.

Stoopid healthcare system

So...I work in the word of healthcare, in a hospital, so I feel like I should know something about how "the system" works. Apparently I don't. I mentioned before in this blog that I went to a new PCP and was not happy with the care, so I tried to make an appt. with a new PCP (who hopefully LISTENS!) and I was told they are booking in August. AUGUST! Like 8 months from now! WTF! So I in typical calm fashion replied back: "Are you serious! What if I have cancer!", so I was able to get an appt in early February with a resident or fellow, it better be a friggin fellow. And then from the oh so forthcoming person on the phone I was informed that if something non-routine is wrong I can get an urgent appt. Well my shoulder hurts, and now my elbow hurts, and now my neck hurts; but I really don't consider that urgent, but voice on the phone said anything non routine. I got in for an appt tomorrow morning and was given several options for tomorrow. (not August!)

My concern is for the non-pushy people, who when they hear a doctor is booking in August they just accept it and say okay. I have always been a bad patient, meaning I push for the best care and I don't shut up until they give me what I think I need. I am paying them, if I think I need an MRI you better damn well order one! Being a pain in the ass for your own health or a loved ones health is something you need to do! Getting off my soapbox now.

Britney Spears, again

So I don't even know what to write about Britney, oh how the mighty have fallen, and fallen damn hard! Remember when she first exploded onto the scene dressed like a slutty Catholic school girl in her first video? And now CRAZIER THEN A LOON! WTF! Seriously, she is nutz! She was given a chance that millions would love to have and that millions are still trying for and it got all messed up. I think that she has been crazy since the beginning but it was well hidden, kinda like Whitney Houston. (Did you watch "Being Bobby Brown"?)

But when a lot of adults end up this way I think it has a lot to do with their upbringing, like she could have been semi-crazy and then had normal parents and turned out okay. But she had parents who brought their child up to be the breadwinner of their family. She supplied the families income from the time she was like 16! When I was 16 I babysat and made probably $25-$30 a night.

Now I can't tear my eyes away from the Britney trainwreck, I check for updates all day at work and every night before I go to bed. It's so bizarre and sad and tragic.

Britney Spears

Dude, Britney Spears...WTF?