Horsey go phblt...

So I went to my horseback riding lesson yesterday and it was soooo much better then my past 2 lessons, different trainer (she's 20, adorable and about 90 lbs and so full of energy!) and I used a western saddle which was such a better fit for me. My legs stay in the right place better and it's a bigger saddle, and you don't have to worry about posting oh and it was hot pink on the bottom! Oh and a much bigger horse, an older one named Seamus. We got used to each other for like 10 minutes until he learned that I was the boss and my new little fireball trainer told me I could start jogging...so I kicked in and started to jog and then I hear "phhbbbllltttttt". My head jerked up and I was like umm....and little trainer was like "He does that sometimes" So I continued my lesson and went up to a faster jog and then "Phhhbbblllttttt". I was riding a farting horse, for the rest of my lesson he continued to have noises coming out of both ends, occasionally he would cough and fart at the same time, at which point I feared for my life because I thought Seamus would explode or deflate.

The lesson was good though, except I kept laughing because I was riding a farting horse.

On another note I wonder how the rest of the people on my shuttle bus to work in the morning would feel if they knew that I was listening to a song by Dr. Dre that includes the line "You found you a bitch that you like, but you can't make a ho a housewife".

Hot time summer in Norwood

So I like most of Americans have realized that there has been some kind of slight increase in the fuel prices. Damn. Not that I travel a lot around Massachusetts, but on Friday I think I drove like 60 miles! Which seems a bit extreme to me, but I do drive to the gym in the AM, then to the train station and back to Norwood, and I had to drive downtown to the Harvard Club (smart people gathering place) for a work thingy. Tom Tom totally had like a seizure on the way and wasn't leading us in the right direction, Mike started singing something and I was like "okay, stop doing that please" (I said please!) So the moral of the story being I want a Vespa! They are super cool and I could feel all European and glamorous! Until I was assaulted by an SUV downtown...hmm...
On another note I get to use up a lot of gas today to go riding. I think I may have to steal the horse and ride it to work, the problem with them though is the poo.

So I am pretty sure that I could rationalize anything, but here is my latest dilemma...I changed my work hours to 10-6, but then it seemed that I didn't have to do that anymore so today and yesterday I worked 8:30 to 5 and it SUCKED! I couldn't go to the gym in the morning because anyone who has ever met me realizes I need more sleep then someone in a coma and nothing is getting me out of bed at 5:45am except a fire or a screaming baby. And I tried to go to the gym after work today, not happening. By the time I get off the train I am so tired I can't stop yawning and I just want my comfy pants and to go to bed, plus I could have finished work instead of running to catch the train! Sooooo...I have to change it back I think or a variation of that. So I got home and I still can't hook up the damn Wii to the Wireless Service so I can't download Super Mario 3 and all the old school games that I want to! Argh!

So then Mike gets home and asks me to start dinner, I mock fainted on the stairs so I didn't have to. He just looked at me and was like "Nevermind I'll do it."

haters

Okay so there some definite dramz happening in my life which isn't cool but I really don't care. If I honestly cared about how people think of me I probably wouldn't get out of bed in the morning. I can think of at least 2 maybe 3 people who hate my guts right now. I doubt they spend much time thinking about it, or maybe they do, but I don't care. I used to care when I was younger but now I'm like: "bitch who doesn't hate me?!"

I did however discover I am an "emotional eater", today instead of my usual low carb routine I had a muffin from the DD (it was so damn cinnamon-y good), 2 pieces of pizza (which had a lot of meat on them), a roll with butter AND AND how 10 Hershey kisses. And now my body is punishing me...I have a headache and I am lethargic...hot.

hotness

No I don't mean me...but dude it was friggin H-O-T this weekend, like Justin Timberlike H-O-T! It almost made me want to drive to Pittsfield to go in my aunt Kate's pool! Instead I had to go play softball on Sunday with Mike because their team was short a girl, I made it to 1st base but only because I walked on ball 4. Even more fun, I didn't have to run there! I made Mike slather himself in sunscreen and he still got burned! I however did not because I re-applied sunscreen at least 4 times. Softball pretty much went like it always did, I was in right field and everytime someone hit the ball I cringed but luckily the ball went into left field almost everytime.

I was driving in my car this morning and like everyone else in the country I was thinking about gas prices (PS...if you saw "I am Legend" the gas prices in a scene were $6.50/gallon-we are so almost there. Hopefully without diseased hairless creatures who want to eat you, but with Will Smith), so this is what I predict:

• In about 10 months there is going to be a baby explosion! You don't want to leave the house...nothing else to do...you see where I am going with this one


• More annoying people on the trains because they don't want to drive-ick.


• Silver lining-SALES people, SALES! On clothes and more importantly, travel!


• Less Hummers on the road-good, you don't need one unless you require a sherpa to get to your home


• Obesity may go down because people will walk more, or it will go up because people don't want to leave their house and will have food delivered to them


• me and netflix gonna be good friends all summer

On a side note...Mike and I are going to see WWE Raw at Moeghan Sun in July...Erin told me I am whitetrash-tastic. This is what happens when you fall in love kiddies, you go to WWE Raw.

Bad Day

So I know that I have said this before, that people are dying in Darfur but for me I had a shit day. I went to work early because I had to leave early so I could meet the locksmith at the condo so I could finally have a dead bolt put on the front door. So I tried to get everything done in time but didn't work, never works when I have to leave on time, never. 4 people kept tryng to talk to me and I could not get out the friggin door.

So I finally make it out the door, it's raining, super. So I ran, hop on the bus and then not a whole lot happens. The train will be chugging into Ruggles in exactly 11 minutes and this bus ain't movin'. N...O...T...M...O...V...I...N...G.

I am sitting on the slowest bus in the world and time is ticking by and then it's 4:00 and the train has left station 12 minutes ago and we hadn't even crossed Huntington Ave. So we finally make it to Ruggles and I get on the orange line to Forest Hills. We get there and I run up the stairs just in time to see the bus pull away. Nice.

So I have to get a cab, $65 dollars later I am finally at my car just as the locksmith calls me to tell me that he is waiting in the parking lot.

So now we have a real lock on the front door, it only took 20 minutes and all I want to know is if I can be a locksmith! 20 minutes of work is worth $80 + cost of the lock.

So I went and got a manicure and now I feel better. The stress isn't knotted up in my forehead anymore. Thank friggin god.

Joys of city life, part 700

I was waiting for the commuter rail this afternoon, sitting on the steps while I read my book. So this woman comes down the stairs, looking kinda...homeless, so our exchange:

Lady: "I'm so hungry, can I have some money for something to eat?"

Me: "No."

Lady: "Just some money, for a blueberry muffin"

Me: (in my head) bitch, please! I want a blueberry muffin! Loaded with carbs! Out loud I said: "No, sorry"
Lady: "I'm sorry too, I'm sorry you have don't have a good heart. You are an evil person."

Me: "Thanks, bye"

Dude, I earn my money by working, a lot, I'm not giving it to you so you can get a carb filled treat! Puleezzze! At least offer to dance for pennies or something.